+- Be Right Back, Uninstalling (https://www.brbuninstalling.com)
+-- Forum: General Category (https://www.brbuninstalling.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=49)
+--- Forum: General Discussion (https://www.brbuninstalling.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=59)
+--- Thread: The Joke Thread (/showthread.php?tid=13992)
Pages:
1
2
The Joke Thread - FlyingMongoose - 01-15-2014
LAG, Didzo, Karth, and the biggest blackest dick.
Alright, now that the obvious jokes are out of the way I figure we all enjoy humor and I think we should share some of our favorite jokes, I'll start with an old but good one.
A man and his wife are discussing groceries:
Wife: "Honey, please go to the market and buy one bottle of milk. If they have eggs, bring six."
The husband goes to the market, and comes back with six bottles of milk.
The wife, now upset yells at her husband: "Why the hell did you buy six bottles of milk!?"
To which the husband responds: "BECAUSE THEY HAD EGGS!"
One liners and whatnot are good too, any joke! Just be sure to include situational set ups when you do jokes where that is needed.
Re: The Joke Thread - A. Crow - 01-15-2014
Joke thread? Hey mongoose, why don't you tell us about your sex life?
Re: The Joke Thread - StolenToast - 01-15-2014
I made this one up when I couldn't answer a question on a chemistry quiz. I didn't get any credit =(
Quote:Two terrible chemists are in a lab.
The first chemist turns to the second and exclaims "I've done it! I've successfully combined P and O[sub]5[/sub] into a molecule!"
To which the second replies incredulously: "Why that's perphospherous!"
Re: The Joke Thread - Hobospartan - 01-15-2014
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
[spoiler]None![/spoiler]
Re: Re: Re: The Joke Thread - FlyingMongoose - 01-15-2014
(01-15-2014, 12:48 PM)CPT Crow link Wrote: Joke thread? Hey mongoose, why don't you tell us about your sex life?
If I did you'd be crying and I'd be laughing.
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
Re: The Joke Thread - Dtrain323i - 01-15-2014
Battered women? I usually bake mine.
Re: - FlyingMongoose - 01-16-2014
I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the freezer.
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
Re: - FlyingMongoose - 01-16-2014
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a Higher Power. Can anybody tell me what it is?"
One child blurted out ... "Aces!"
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
Re: - Chooly - 01-16-2014
(01-16-2014, 01:28 AM)FlyingMongoose link Wrote: I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the freezer.
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
I like my preteens like I like my rum... all mixed up with coke
Re: The Joke Thread - Dtrain323i - 01-16-2014
Liberalism
yeah, i went there
Re: - FlyingMongoose - 01-16-2014
My brother called me a liberal when I posted about how net neutrality died. I then went through a very big schpiel on how her neutrality is good for everyone including the market. And how losing net neutrality is actually something that goes against capitalism.
Any way back to the jokes.
I'm going offensive now.
Why shouldn't women drive?
There is no roads between the kitchen and bedroom.
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
Re: The Joke Thread - Goffin - 01-16-2014
How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow.Â
Re: The Joke Thread - Geoff - 01-16-2014
great jokes boys
Re: The Joke Thread - Hobospartan - 01-17-2014
American History in-joke here...
What do you call five black people having sex?
[spoiler]A threesome![/spoiler]
Re: The Joke Thread - StolenToast - 01-17-2014
(01-17-2014, 12:16 AM)Höböspärtän link Wrote: American History in-joke here...lol
What do you call five black people having sex?
[spoiler]A threesome![/spoiler]
Re: - Dtrain323i - 01-17-2014
(01-16-2014, 04:49 PM)FlyingMongoose link Wrote: My brother called me a liberal when I posted about how net neutrality died. I then went through a very big schpiel on how her neutrality is good for everyone including the market. And how losing net neutrality is actually something that goes against capitalism.
Any way back to the jokes.
I'm going offensive now.
Why wouldn't women drive?
There is no roads between the kitchen and bedroom.
Sent from my subdermal neurological implant.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
Re: The Joke Thread - FlyingMongoose - 01-20-2014
Why don't women wear watches?
There's a clock on the stove!
Re: The Joke Thread - Chooly - 01-21-2014
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs
-Nailed to a wall : Art
-Floating in the water : Bob
-Laying on your porch : Matt
Re: The Joke Thread - spm201 - 01-21-2014
Well my Irish potato joke got taken, so I guess I have to resort to my less tasteful ones. Time to get offensive.
So the other day I'm fucking my daughter and my wife walks in on us. She just stood there in shock, but I couldn't tell what surprised her more. That I was fucking my daughter, or that the abortion clinic let me keep it.
Re: The Joke Thread - FlyingMongoose - 01-21-2014
I use to be a necrophiliac, but the rotten cunt split on me.