Be Right Back, Uninstalling

That train's got places to be and no time for shit

that sign
NEXT TRAIN , DO NOT BOARD

(03-24-2014, 03:38 PM)Luinbariel link Wrote: [ -> ]That train's got places to be and no time for shit

That's usually how I feel when I'm trying to get out of Chicago.

Ba dum tssshhh

for Louuuhn.

Riker sits down

(03-25-2014, 09:33 PM)rumbot link Wrote: [ -> ]for Louuuhn.

Riker sits down

What is he, constantly riding a space horse?

(03-25-2014, 09:33 PM)rumbot link Wrote: [ -> ]for Louuuhn.

Riker sits down

The Next Generation episode 2 - beard on beard

Poor train just wanted to hang out with those guys.

Possibly the most considerate train in Chicago


IM SORRY IM LATE IM SORRY IM LATE OH SHIT FUCK BOOOM

(03-25-2014, 10:02 PM)Luinbariel link Wrote: [ -> ][quote author=rumbot link=topic=2632.msg277264#msg277264 date=1395801192]
for Louuuhn.

Riker sits down

What is he, constantly riding a space horse?
[/quote]

i want to own a bunch of low backed chairs so i can do that when i have houseguests

Marvelous, Hek.

We should start a campaign to get the Prowler renamed to the Riker.

(03-26-2014, 08:42 PM)rumbot link Wrote: [ -> ]Marvelous, Hek.

We should start a campaign to get the Prowler renamed to the Riker.

TR Alts - Dont Touch Flavor Pocket
NC Alts - Riker's Sensual Beard

(03-26-2014, 10:19 PM)Caffeine link Wrote: [ -> ][quote author=rumbot link=topic=2632.msg277317#msg277317 date=1395884558]
Marvelous, Hek.

We should start a campaign to get the Prowler renamed to the Riker.

TR Alts - Dont Touch Flavor Pocket
NC Alts - Riker's Sensual Beard
[/quote]

make it so number 1

Guys where does one pick up women that are fit? I'm thinking the rock climbing wall because it's pretty difficult to do. I've recently become not invisible and I want to start working on my social skills a bit.

I don't really have any problems talking with women all that much but I avoid approaching most people I don't know because most of the time I don't have anything to talk about with said person. I don't think it's really socially acceptable to walk up to someone and tell them that you think they are attractive, is it? Perhaps only when they also find you attractive? I guess that kind of talk is ok at parties and all but not around campus.
or is the art of it just being able to smoothly transition meaningless talk into meaningful talk? I'll say hello to people I sit near and ask them how they're doing, but everyone seems to be caught up in their own stuff even when the're just waiting for the bus, etc. Perhaps I'm just not doing it often enough to get positive feedback?

(03-27-2014, 07:28 PM)zaneyard link Wrote: [ -> ]Guys where does one pick up women that are fit? I'm thinking the rock climbing wall because it's pretty difficult to do. I've recently become not invisible and I want to start working on my social skills a bit.

I don't really have any problems talking with women all that much but I avoid approaching most people I don't know because most of the time I don't have anything to talk about with said person. I don't think it's really socially acceptable to walk up to someone and tell them that you think they are attractive, is it? Perhaps only when they also find you attractive? I guess that kind of talk is ok at parties and all but not around campus.
or is the art of it just being able to smoothly transition meaningless talk into meaningful talk? I'll say hello to people I sit near and ask them how they're doing, but everyone seems to be caught up in their own stuff even when the're just waiting for the bus, etc. Perhaps I'm just not doing it often enough to get positive feedback?

Going up to a woman and telling her right off the bat you think she's attractive is... not something I would suggest. It is instantly off-putting and will instantly put many people on edge, make them close off.

People in general, not just women, want to know that other people are interested in who they are. Not just how they look. You say you don't like meaningless chit-chat, but to be honest, it's still important. It is what'll open the door to more, what will get someone to open up to you and feel comfortable with you.

Well, don't go rock climbing just because you want to pick up women, that's a little bit sleazy. If you want to get into climbing then go for it and you'll be sure to meet new people. I personally have good experiences with climbers since they are all really friendly and down to earth.
I love ultimate frisbee, and there are a lot of attractive ultimate frisbee players I interact with every season, so I would suggest joining your local frisbee league. But that's useless advice unless you're actually interested in the sport.

There are fit women in every "fit" activity so it really depends on what you enjoy doing.

My suggestion for interaction is to try and get to know the person first instead of telling them that they are attractive etc and trying to pick them up. Just start up a normal conversation as you would with a new friend. It helps when you show that you're interested in her as a person rather than just aesthetically.

Edit: Luin and I basically agree on the instapick-up being a no-no. Starting convos with random strangers is difficult since everyone has places to be/things to do. This is why I suggest joining a sport/athletic activity so that it's easier to establish friendly relations. (I go get beer with my random frisbee teams after every game and that's been a great way to get to know people)

(03-27-2014, 07:56 PM)Luinbariel link Wrote: [ -> ]Going up to a woman and telling her right off the bat you think she's attractive is... not something I would suggest. It is instantly off-putting and will instantly put many people on edge, make them close off.

Oh that's quite what I would assume. I don't do it and everything I think is true tells me not to do that.

(03-27-2014, 07:56 PM)Luinbariel link Wrote: [ -> ]People in general, not just women, want to know that other people are interested in who they are. Not just how they look. You say you don't like meaningless chit-chat, but to be honest, it's still important. It is what'll open the door to more, what will get someone to open up to you and feel comfortable with you.

I don't dislike meaningless chit chat, but I just haven't had any much success in moving past it. I'll save my excuses for my lack of success.

(03-27-2014, 08:01 PM)Käse link Wrote: [ -> ]Well, don't go rock climbing just because you want to pick up women, that's a little bit sleazy. If you want to get into climbing then go for it and you'll be sure to meet new people. I personally have good experiences with climbers since they are all really friendly and down to earth.

Oh absolutely, I didn't mean to word my question that way. I absolutely love rock climbing but I also love a lot of other things, and I want to do things that are more social in nature instead of just: riding my motorcycle by myself, playing video games by myself, lifting by myself, etc.

Also, I haven't looked into ultimate at all here yet, that's a good suggestion. I did it for a year at home and it was a blast, although I've put on some weight since then.

(03-27-2014, 08:01 PM)Käse link Wrote: [ -> ]Just start up a normal conversation as you would with a new friend. It helps when you show that you're interested in her as a person rather than just aesthetically.

I do it all the time, I haven't felt like anyone has reciprocated interest in me. Perhaps it's the matter of a small sample size. Most of my group of friends are male.
I guess it's really only in the situation of a cold approach that I don't know how to properly interact. Maybe there's not much of a place for cold approaches?

(03-27-2014, 08:01 PM)Käse link Wrote: [ -> ]This is why I suggest joining a sport/athletic activity so that it's easier to establish friendly relations. (I go get beer with my random frisbee teams after every game and that's been a great way to get to know people)

I think I'm going to follow this advice. I currently have a very small circle of people I interact with often and I really want to become more comfortable with social interactions.


Side topic: I have quite a bit of people I would consider "friends," in the way that we're friendly, hang out every once and a while, but I often go out of my way to go chat with people in the lounge, go say hi to people that have their doors open, things like that, but it seems like no one else ever does the same. Am I just 'going out of my way' for people that don't really care much about me, or is that just the way most people are? Am I just the kind of person that no one is ever going to be excited to see?

Rock climbing isn't super social unless you find someone that needs a belay buddy. I used to rock climb a lot and I never really met a stranger doing it. I started talking to a girl once cuz she seemed nice but then she started throwing off this "oh god this guy is trying to pick me up" vibe so I stopped. I usually get along with women really well so I try and make women friends and I always hate when that awkwardness takes over so I would try and avoid it. Now that I'm married its easier, not quite up to the level of being gay but still easier to convince women I'm interested in them as a friend not a fuck buddy.

(03-27-2014, 08:39 PM)Surf314 link Wrote: [ -> ]Rock climbing isn't super social unless you find someone that needs a belay buddy. I used to rock climb a lot and I never really met a stranger doing it. I started talking to a girl once cuz she seemed nice but then she started throwing off this "oh god this guy is trying to pick me up" vibe so I stopped. I usually get along with women really well so I try and make women friends and I always hate when that awkwardness takes over so I would try and avoid it. Now that I'm married its easier, not quite up to the level of being gay but still easier to convince women I'm interested in them as a friend not a fuck buddy.

At our wall when it's busy someone is always waiting for a belay or chilling watching a friend climb or something, seemed easy enough to chat with people.
Still gotta test for my belay cert though.

I'm not the best at going up and talking to strangers at parties either, but I've gotten better at it and there two rules that I usually go by. First is that most people want to talk about themselves, so I suggest coming up a with a few go-to topics to start up a conversation with. Things like "What do you do for a living?" or "What kind of music do you like?" as well as something context-sensitive, so for example at ACEN you could ask "Do you like anime?" These are gateway questions that will open up other topics to talk about. The second rule is critical listening and empathy. Even if you really have no interest in small talk or the topic the other person is talking to you about, at least listen to what they have to say. When you listen critically you get clues for what other sort of topics to bring up and it often builds into a more personal conversation. Use empathy to be more aware of the other person's mood and use that to direct the conversation. One last thing that I'll mention is not so much of as rule as it is just something to consider; try to be aware of the mood you're giving off. Often times when you're bored with a conversation it will show and the other person(s) will be able to pick up on it.